Drinking too many Cokes can give you more than just diabetes, kidney problems, UTIs and heart failure. Latest news reports coming in now show drinking large amounts of coke products can also give you free Holiday photo cards from Kodak. That's right, folks. Finally a positive from drinking large quantities of only God knows what and tons of sugar. Free holiday photo cards (minus s&h, of course.) So now I'm on my latest quest to get a festive picture of me & my honey to put in our first ever holiday cards. I'd love for us to be in fall sweaters sitting in the leaves in our backyard; however with the weather in the 80s, and a tree towering no more than 3 feet high with less than 20 leaves, I'm doubting I'll get that picture I'm wanting in my yard. Guess I'll have to venture elsewhere.
Speaking of my yard...Last night Andrew & I had gone to grab a bite for dinner to bring home and eat. As we're pulling down our street I'm very engaged in the story I'm telling Andrew. We pull into the drive and put the garage door up. I'm still talking. We start backing out. I think nothing of it and keep talking until he starts turning back out onto the road. I say, "Andrew, what in the world are you doing?" My stomach growling seemed more important than his perfect parking. He said, "I'm wondering why in the world there's a vehicle in my back yard." Crap. That's one of those moments where your stomach kinda falls into your feet and you get really antsy. There sat an SUV in our back yard. Mind you, it's not like it was half way parked in the street and half in our yard...like if there weren't enough parking at the neighbor's house. Nope. They were parked in our back yard off the tiny little one way, dead end road behind our house. I say let's call the cops. Andrew says, let's go scope it out. Trapped in the truck, I'm along for the ride. We pull down the tiny road behind our house and see the silver SUV parked a good 30 feet into our yard. The lights shine inside the truck. Hm, no one is in the car. At least we thought no one was in the car. We were proven wrong when two bare legs popped up in the backseat and two kids were fumbling around trying to move. That's right, readers. Two curious, hormone driven teenagers were probably conceiving a child in my backyard. Andrew decides he's going to take this into his own hands and go give those kids a come to Jesus meeting. Because the road is barely wide enough to hold Andrew's truck and there's nowhere to turn around, it took us a good 45 seconds to get turned back in the direction of our sex crazed trespassers. As we got closer, they sped onto the road. We followed in hot pursuit, going 15 mph over the speed limit...a gutsy thing for me to allow. We followed them all the way back to town to the Southaven Amphitheatre, got their license plate number, and let them go. Andrew says he wished he would have been in the house and seen them. He said he would have walked out there in his underwear and boots with his shotgun and tapped on the window with it. That would have been the best birth control they would have ever gotten. So...for all you people out there who want to come try to mate in our backyard, unless you have 4 legs and a tail, I wouldn't try it! We'll hunt you down!
2 comments:
Wow! That is hilarious! I can't believe they were in your backyard! It's not like its acres--they were focused! HA!
I came over from your link on Baby Bangs because this seemed like too good a story NOT to hear. Oh goodness,that is so funny! I bet they never tried parking in someone's backyard like that again! :)
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